May Is Mental Health Awareness Month

#maternalmentalhealthweek

Becoming a mom is advertised as being one of the best and happiest adventures one will embark on. Motherhood is a time that women will spring into action with motherly instincts and confidently care for her children, as well as, all her other life responsibilities. 

❤️Ask any mom and she will tell you she loves her children more than anything and being a mom has been her most important, and joyous, role!

#speakthesecret When I became a mom, I started crying in labor and never stopped. This wasn’t the happy journey advertised or that I thought my mom had navigated so well as a teacher and having breastfed 6 children, including twins.

Suddenly I was faced with fears, doubts, and the fact that my mom would never see her grandchildren. I could NOT share motherhood with my mom. I hit rock bottom with postpartum depression and anxiety so debilitating I was hospitalized for a week.

✨I kept asking, “Why didn’t anyone tell me I could feel this way? Why didn’t anyone tell me I might not be able to make breast milk?”✨

It was at this low point I began a new journey, one fraught with tears and pain.

I embraced the fact that I was put through this painful experience to be a voice for women who suffer in silence, especially moms. 

✔️50-75% of moms will experience “baby blues” and 15% will experience severe postpartum depressions, and maternal suicide rates have increased to .6% of all births and typically occur 9-12 months postpartum.

✨A woman’s physical self, hormones, emotions, and identity is literally changed overnight. ✨

Society has told us, “Oh you’re a mom, you aren’t supposed to take care of yourself. Your job is to just be a mom. You’re a mom, being sleep deprived is just part of the job.” Sleep is a basic human need and sleep deprivation is also a form of torture.

Being a mom has not been easy for many moms. Especially if you haven’t been fortunate enough to have support from your mom, whether she is living or deceased.

I have also vowed to be authentic about my own motherhood journey and speak the secret.

And as the years goes on……..

I realized my Mom had left me many “messages”. My Mom died, at age 55, missing my twin brothers’ high school graduation, an event she fought to attend. She has since missed weddings, family vacations, and the birth of her 6 grandchildren.

✨I now understood that many women, especially moms, are not truly happy. Moms get really good at performing and putting on a fake smile. ✨

My mom’s life was full of teaching, grading papers, laundry, driving kids to practices, and putting food on the table. I don’t remember what she did for fun? Did she have any hobbies? Self care wasn’t even a topic 15 years ago and she delayed seeking medical care. Yes, my Dad worked a full time job as well, but moms often carry a heavy and invisible load.

Maybe you or a mom you know has paused their hopes and dreams, shrunk, held back, or succumbed to life instead of LIVING life to the fullest because she is a mom. Have you relinquished your personal needs or goals to better the lives of others, but deep down feel unhappy and unfulfilled?

There is no question that mothers are special! Your dreams don’t have an expiration date and you can reinvent yourself as a fit, fab, fearless WOMAN, who also happens to be a mom, in any season of life. It’s never too late to take care of yourself, until it is.

✨Take a lesson from my mom, don’t let life pass you by. Moms deserve to be championed everyday and not just on Mother’s Day!✨